one two three fourrrrnication!
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Ya know, years from now when that kid is old enough, I'll get to regale him with the story of how I was his father's AND uncle's first gay experience.
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
she got to the point every few minutes she checked to see if her boobs were still there.
I know it was you that I fucked last night... I can smell my disappointment all over the sheets
dude there's no way we're going back in there for your puke shoes
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
Carrying your underwear around in your purse on Sunday morning is its own religious experience
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
I swear, the guy behind me wasn't paying attention until the words "middle aged fuckboy" came out of my mouth.
My disney ticket is covered in lube, do you think they will accept it?
Randomize
