Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
nailed a girl as she was wearing a darth vader shirt. Cross that one off my list.
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
Haha its ok. When we got back you sat in the car and attempted to tell me in sign language you were blacked out lol
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
You kept running up to random groups of people and saying "I'm a Dallas Cowboy Cheerleader so we all have to chug our drinks!" and they all listened to you.
Just got offered to exchange moonshine for manscaping services by a gay guy. I'm gonna have the smoothest back in St. Louis county.
Well I'm sleeping with two of them cause they have nice cars. And the third cause she has a big rack. I'm just really waiting for it all to blow up in my face so I can find a girl I'm actually interested in
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
I impressed him by taking off my panties without removing my pants.
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
It was only a blow job in his car. It's the same as giving a friend a back rub.
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