is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
I could make wine with my vomit
I just beer bonged a sparks. You better get your ass over here because no one is on my level yet
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
sooo I am sorta kinda using your name as my stripper stage name.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
I have no idea. But I feel like I could climb a mountain and then have sex on it.
No one should ever have to Neosporin their nipples. At least he apologized.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
You got drunk, made toast, and declared yourself a domestic goddess.
Randomize
