he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
Just had sex with your cousin. That's what you get for throwing away a perfectly good microwave. Hopefully you learned from this experience.
I really want to lead this Amish guy into temptation
I'm not judging you. Just know that you could be Queen of The World. Instead you're 5:28 p.m ponging. I hope you're at least winning
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
I have what looks like a rubber stamp mark on my cock from last night that says "Magic Marla Approved" Do we know a Marla?
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
So how was the sex with me last night?
No worse than usual.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
