rhymes with "ouble enetration"
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
The EMTs said they would give me as many blankets as I wanted if I didn't pee in the ambulance. They even turned on the sirens.
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Zombie crawl summary: 5 of 6 friends successfully laid. friend 6 too drunk to care and making out with a whale (not a costume)
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
While he was at a job interview yesterday, I was dropping acid. So that's the aesthetic of our relationship rn.
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
She was riding a razor scooter down the street wearing nothing but a feather boa it was beautiful.
Randomize