But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I'm watching Intervention to get pumped up for tonight
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dinner was cheetos vodka and whiskey. This is what happens when even your booty call breaks up with you.
Well that was the first and last time I've had to write "divorce party" on a request time off form. I'm throwing it for my mom. What is my life turning into.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
Also you can't just sext a Michelle quote from Full House.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
How have you been? I haven’t talked to you since you dyed your pubes.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
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