dude can i febreze my hair or is that slutty?
The sex was great until she started shouting, "Succeed!, Succeed!" Then it was like I was fucking a motivational speaker. Awkward.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
No it was the best sex I've had in months. Nothing turns me on more than getting rid of a boyfriend.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Don't worry we will all be making bad decisions soon
That's the most comforting thing I've heard in months
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize
