She's allergic to latex.
Lucky bastard.
His housemate was playing a sad violin solo for me on my way out. God I hate musicians.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
That was awkward , having sex with her while her husband watched via Skype. I'm a porn star or a target. Idk
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
I watched one of the videos of you hanging from the rafters, and it is both violent and sexual in nature.
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
