Getting drunk in a different country is not a good idea. Lets just say spanish women, 17 yr olds from missouri, prostitutes, and a poodle. I don´t want to leave spain.
We shared that special kind of eye contact that can only be experienced when you know one party is saying "Oh god, I fucked him in the back seat when you were in the front, didn't I."
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
I want a MapMyFart App, where I can mark every spot where I have ripped one. Like here.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
He just showed up on my porch naked with just a blanket and a trash bag
This time last year, you were undressing me from my gecko costume and getting freaky in a public bathroom. Tough to top that New Years Eve.
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
