Partly cloudy chance of praying to the porcelin gods
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
He always takes home straight guys. He plays One Night Stand on Ledgendary Mode
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
Also a shrinking boner emoji would be helpful
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
Randomize
