It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
I really have to stop waking up in hot tubs on Friday mornings.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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