I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I just googled the nutrition facts for a mcgriddle and yet I still want to go to mcdonalds
I could give you a full detailed description of 75% of the penises in that room
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
She's not a foreskin expert like you
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Is it rude to send him a, "happy birthday, I hope you finally get an STD" text?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
So drunk me is not subtlety trying to get her boss to cheat on her husband and have a lesbian affair with me. Sober me is ok with that.
Randomize
