I woke up this morning naked, with a to-go box from Qdoba, an entire meal completely untouched. I have been piecing together my night to find some answers. I feel like Nancy Drew.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
6 other girls and I took an ice cream truck to the bar when we couldn't get a cab. Best birthday ever.
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
The adults are the big ones right?
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