It's like a parade of train wrecks.
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
today he pulled me aside to show me a lawn mower that he drew above his pubes. I saw his pubes in all their glory. Right there. In spanish class. Hola.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Puked up what appears to be battery acid next to the treadmill. Everyone noticed.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
By the way, anytime you want to go toe to toe on Doggystyle lyrics just let me know!
Who is this? Did we just become best friends?!
I have booze and I wanna give you a bj. How can you be mad at me?
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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