How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Confirmed. Vegetarians give terrible head.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
Just walked in on him banging another girl. He told me " sorry but I'm gonna finish now that I'm caught" ...... I think this is the reason god gave me four older brothers....
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
I walked in on him pumping himself up by headbanging to the drumbeat from Jumanji.
Tomorrow is my favorite texting day of the year... It's where I send every guy I've had sex with this past year a text saying "happy not a Father's Day" and we laugh and I get so much dick it's wonderful.
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
I just put together something from IKEA so that’s mandatory oral for a week.
Randomize
