The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Imagine a baby lion feeding on an injured gazelle and it tasting fresh blood for the first time. That's me and this breakfast sammich
The family from the blindsided came and talked to us last night. The dad owns 68 taco bells. You would have been so inspired
gave you a haircut while you slept. Please don't kill me.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
My date bailed but I got to take a nap so I'm cool with it.
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
Randomize
