did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
he aplogized for the shitty sex and called me "ma'am" when he did it. And he wants redemption sex. Gah I love southern gentlemen.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
We're both great liars, in committed relationships, and horny. Its the perfect storm of cheating
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
In related news... Actually, nope. I don't have any orgy-related news. You win.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Sitting in my kitchen at 3am, craving dick and eating peanut butter instead. I'm not sure how I feel about being 27.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
Randomize
