i was rollin on her like bob the builder
do herpes really smell.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Everything smells like syrup. But I guess that's better than last time when everything smelled like beer.
I listened to the last 10 minutes of that 20 minute voicemail, it's solid gold. At one point he literally suggests we buy tasers and go around shooting people.
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
This Halloween will be different. I'm just here to get shitfaced, not troll around looking for slutty nun pussy.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
I made him cum so hard he couldn't play video games for like an hour. I've never been more proud of myself.
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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