i would rim the shit out of meg ryan
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
just got booed by the entire restaurant.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I'm sorry I tried putting my balls in your cup holder.
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Hows your mom
Shes good, she claims she wasnt drunk
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
Randomize
