I thought you said his peep was too small
it is but i have no money and nothing is on tv until 7 when americas next top model comes on.
It's not kidnapping if it's romantic
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
3pm strippers are depressing
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
Well, if it gives you any indication, when I got there, there was already some dude passed out naked in the treehouse.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
