You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
If the Four Horseman of the Apocalypse gang banged each other and had a kid, it would look like the creature I woke up next to this morning.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
As a matter of fact you told me i fulfilled your "woodshop teacher fantasy"
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
He snuck out of bed at 9 am and came back with pizza and a bottle of wine. I think I'm in love!
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
Can we fangirl? Can we have fangirl Tuesdays?
Sure lol what's that?
Oh, dear, sweet Laura. Please start singing A Whole New World. I have Aladdin's part, you're Jasmine.
Why?
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My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
We have a shopping cart in our front lawn. Also Mickey D's breakfast?
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
I was just in the bathroom and some guy yelled all hail the king... i cant go anywhere without getting recognized anymore.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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