ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
the new apple iphone has a feature that can find itself if you lose it, apple is getting closer to making a phone completely drunkproof...
oh vodka. i could write you a sonnet.
Everything about him screamed your future.
Somehow he came on his own face...then he freaked out
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
To the person who left a cup of vomit in the bathroom: I commend you for your aim but you are dead to me- not an ideal birthday present.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Apparently I made a stripper cry last night when I paid her $10 to go away
Can you explain the plethora of sunflower seeds in the dryer?
Just remember, if we get caught, you're deaf and I don't speak English.
well he somehow got his hand stuck in some bike spokes trying to reach for a blunt he dropped and that's NOT the reason he's in the hospital...?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
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