I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
why didn't you say something constructive like "stop chugging that vodka"?
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
She's the barista slut.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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