Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
last time i saw her she was begging the broken jukebox to play lady gaga.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
And I feel bad.
Because we're having a serious discussion about our sex life and you're playing minecraft?
Seriously I will never run in my wedges while drinking racing home to have sex ever again
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
AND I JUST GOT FUCKING DAUGHTER ZONED. NO. I'M DONE. I HATE BOYS. ASEXUALITY HERE I COME.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Ted is on HBO in 20 minutes...not sure if this or the drunken dance party I had at the bar to a N*SYNC Christmas song 20 minutes ago is the highlight of my week so far.
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
God I love dating single dads. They've got their shit at least a little bit together and there's always snacks after sex. #nakedfruitrollups
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
