Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
I found him with a guitar and his kitten in his room. He was singing a song he'd titled "you're a cat". Guess what most of the lyrics were...
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
I can't turn off my feet"
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
So on a scale of 1-10 how mad would you be if I sent you a picture from the inside of a strip club
after we fucked i left the room and when i came back he was patting his dick whispering "prouda you lil guy...prouda you"
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