I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I woke up to them arguing over who would get my morning wood. Oh, and I was dressed as Santa.
he asked if thats how we do it in the states..like there's cultural difference in fucking between canada and the us..
If I was there, I'd make you a vicodin spiked sandwich.
There are paw prints all over my ceiling.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
I got drunk and bought a house last night. Also, I threw up on Mike's lawn. I'm pretty excited about one of those two things.
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
