We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
so I was thinking like, Rob Pattinson could make so much money whoring himself out dressed as Edward Cullen.
yeah, I mean if he's down to fuck a lot of fat chicks and stare at Tiger Beat posters of himself above the bed...
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
Then he wanted a handjob in the car. While my cousin was driving. To krispy kreme. And there was someone else in the backseat.
Jesus...So southern.
He's just so adorable. And I don't want to fuck someone who's adorable.
I blacked out for most of the day but apparently I still met with my prof. I made notes...
you strike me as the kind of person who when they spill something on their lap they take off their pants and eat it anyways. right off the crotch seam.
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
you've already made the comitment to pee in public you should at least whip your dick out
Randomize
