I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
guess they didn't have any donuts in her size.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
My mom and I were trying to explain to my sister what an uncircumcised penis looks like. We had some minor disagreements.
It's sad that your definition of adulthood entails banging your boss after getting hammered at happy hour, and putting the tab on the company credit card.
Just got hit on by a middle-aged puerto-rican clown who told me that it would be bad to date someone who offers to buy me coffee and makes something of themselves. I love the NY subway.
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
No, dude...I agree it's great in theory but I promise you that 80 drunk 21 year old sorority girls together in one room for formal is one of the worst drama filled ideas ever. Ever.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
At what point did i decide poptarts, nyquil, and whiskey was a good idea?
Randomize
