Hey, go out with us like you promised. You're younger than us and should be able to handle your coke problem with grace.
i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
on the way home the dog started throwing up her bone in the car..so naturally i started to puke too
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
Your brother just walked into my room, pissed drunk and butt naked, got into my bed and fell asleep. In knowing I am gay, you have one hour to deal with him before I do
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
on a scale of one to ten where does vomming from being hungover during a professionalism lecture fit
The police officer that arrested me Friday night just bought me a shot
Randomize
