Bike broken, reschedule party till thursday:(
I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
i just remember explaining why my socks were better than everyone elses.
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
They put 3 tbs of cinnamon in vodka shots and called it the "cinnamon death challenge"
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Glad to know I rate above a cabbage on the parenting scale.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
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