So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Everyone just saw your hickey on TV and on the jumbotron at the hockey game.
Thanks dad.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
He was trying to put his hand up my shirt but I remembered the coke was stashed in my bra so I moved his hand to my pants
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
I was tied up in bed before noon, the rest of the day can go to hell.
Just had to find a way to explain to the border patrol that we were coming into canada "for about a half hour to have one last under 21 drink before kendals birthday at midnight." He said ok and told us where the closest bar was. Nice man.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
Had sex outside for the third time last night. Mosquito bites all over my ass, and i think i have a rash on my nipples. When will i learn.
Just wait till winter
There's a fuckload of syrup all over the floor.
Randomize
