he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
My vag should have a twitter account. It would be like "destroyed another condom today".
making your facebook status TEQUILA is like basically saying "im easy tonight. feel free to take advantage"
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Half the people who compete die. All the rest either lose their minds or grow an innate fear of sharks, vodka, and fishbowls
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
I still can't believe I was army crawling thru his backyard at 2am..
PSA Do not blow dry your junk.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize