A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
The bartender said he wanted to turn you gay, and we got free shots the rest of the night
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Nothing kills the mood like him going to slap my ass and he hits his balls at the same time
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
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