Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Rub youre cunt and tell me you love me.
Your incorrect use of you're doesn't arouse me in the slightest.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Fuck positive energy. I choose drinking instead,
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
He threw me out a window and then threw raw ground beef at us. Normally you'd hate someone for that, but that guy's great.
And this is the part where I need you not to judge me. Remember that I have never seen a penis do that and that I have a weird sexual curiosity
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
also, the amount of semen in my carpet right now is unforgivable...
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
Also I just had a flash back ... He told me I have nice nipples and then asked me about yours..
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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