Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
You are ridiculously similar to a unicorn, and I want to fuck that unicorn.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
i just remember singing the theme song from 2 and 1/2 men to my hair
I get so pissed when there is something that NEEDS to be made fun of and you're not here.
Randomize
