Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
Just found 50 pesos and a coke spoon in my dads old shit. Gotta love the 70s
So all semester this guy and girl have been talking, and today is the last class and we are doing nothing. I would have skipped but I want to see if he seals the deal or pusses out. It's like a season finale.
i just googled the alphabet. i couldnt remember if it was jklomnop or jklmnop.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Interesting preview of what next year will be like. Side note, missing a chunk of flesh from my middle finger.
Why the fuck did you text me at 4 in the morning telling me not to have sex with the bird?
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Two dicks, one me.
Yoga's definitely paying off.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Randomize