I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
after we had sex he went grocery shopping. at 6 am. i've never been more confused in my life
How creepy of a mustache can you grow by wednesday night?
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
So I dropped $130 while buying shots for an army ranger, got my fake taken, almost went to jail, and came out of my black out when I was talking to the cops with a stolen detour sign in my hands.
Thank you for not puking on my lap during the first class of the semester. And fuck you for doing it in the second.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
well that's what you get for sleeping with a guy called 'the defiler'
Bring me a cialis. .. I feel like having a super dick today
We poured all the Fireball on the Slip and Slide and long story short I have two black eyes.
Being drunk at Chick-fil-A is a dystopian experience
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
Randomize
