it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I just found out the FDA voted to ban Vicodin, my last connection to this world has been destroyed
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
IM NOT LETTING YOU PEE ON ME IF THATS WHAT YOURE GETTING AT.
I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
i can barely afford taco bell don't think a baby is in the budget
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
