On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
At some point last night I thought pissing in a bottle was an awesome idea when I woke up a little piss was actually in the bottle a lot was on my TV remote
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
i wish i just like had a pee bag attached to me and i could just go whenever i want wherever i want
Piñatas plus fireworks don't mix well
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I had to switch to male Siri because I could feel female Siri voice judging me for reading my sexts out loud. Also, the dude voice keeps me in the mood.
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
She was drunk running in the middle of the street when a cop saw her,picked her up and dropped her off at her house. This really doesn't surprise me.
Randomize
