Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
I would have screamed and cried and bled and shit and then died. Fuck that guy.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
Every Easter every single one the baby Jesus butt plug comes up
When we sit on the couch watching TV, she always cups her hand around my balls. Not sure if it's a sign of affection or a "power play" to remind me just how vulnerable I am if she chooses to make an aggressive squeeze.
Before making travel and hotel reservations to meet your "affair" for the first time, consult your menstrual calendar! $633 wasted!
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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