If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
Still had my bottle opener ring on. Started to give him a hand job. LOL
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Just to warn you I probably wont be able to do anything that involves standing up
I woke up with my panties in the cat food dish, and everything covered in honey and bruises.
The feeling are messing with the penis
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
my downstairs neighbor came by to say he’s having a huge loud party tomorrow, handed me a toblerone bar, and said thank you in advance for your understanding
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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