Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
just found a sign outside my brothers door "not going to church, don't even try" and he is covered is vomit in his bed.
just found out my horoscope sign is scales. it's like i was destined to be a drug dealer
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
When it gets to the point that I'm more comfortable being naked at his house than my own, it's time to readdress the fuckbuddyship.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
I am drunk. Riding an elevator. You can smell the beer. Doctor on with me just smiling at me... He agrees, fuck cancer.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
I'd love you more if you were covered in hot cheetos
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
Randomize
