What kind of poor, pathetic town do we live in where a horny teenage girl is sitting in her basement on a saturday night, unlaid?
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
Princesses don't give blow jobs
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
Stripper told me "sorry i'm not squezing my tits in your face much, I just had a kid and don't want to squirt you in the eye with milk. " in the middle of my lap dance
He kept spanking me and talking about biomedical science.
Aw, you fucked a pre-med? you're moving up in the world!
Why were you having sex on top of my left over pizza in the kitchen?
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
Well am going to a strip club before sun down, I dont think anything good can come from that.
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I swear you won't find cereal in your washer machine again.
He was so energetic. It was like screwing a bunny.
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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