I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
Even if you were sober, spitters are STILL quitters, end of story.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
im not sure if this headache is from the car accident or cocaine withdrawl
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
And you seriously thought you could just walk in naked with a bow tied around your penis?
It seemed like a good idea at the time...
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