Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
she was screaming in french about how classy it was to be drinking wine. oh... she was drinking it out of the bottle. with a beer in her other hand while throwing up.
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
My phone keeps autocorrecting to the "st. Natty's Day Parade" and I'm completely okay with that
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
can we not speak foreign languages when I'm on drugs
highlight of my day: hitchhiking a ride with random locals. tried to make conversation, asked what they do. driver says "you clearly don't recognize me." turns out i have had sex with him and forgot.
You are officially qualified to graduate from college.
Last night I realized my life is an experiment of really bad decisions when I had to leave without my underwear. But at least I'm expanding my life experience.
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
