Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I thought he was gonna sex me but then he ran to my bathroom and jerked off
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
fyi gin and iced coffee...not my greatest invention
Does Vicodin go better with white or red wine?
they were having sex on the toilet apparently and everytime someone knocked they flushed. it was like an auditory scoreboard of sex duration.
I stared at his lazy eye for so long, he thought I had one too. Then we bonded over our lazy eyes. I had to fake one all night. My head is fucking killing me. NEVER pretend to have a lazy eye.
I ate the most amazing corn dog today.
I will probably dream about it.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
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