Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
I need to get the stench of sex and broken dreams out of my room
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
I got the shit slapped outta me last night but the pain in my jaw doesn’t even compare to the hangover I have.
Randomize
