I wasn't pimping you out... I was helping you network!
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Let's put it this way, it's 9am and that box of wine looks like the cure
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Triple a is towing cars for free tonight and tomorrow night. Can we take advantage of this ?
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
