fuck off i hope your children turn out to be republicans
you're just mad cause i madeout with you while having a mouth full of chewed pretzels
Lil wasted at a baby shower. Here's to beating teen pregnancy BOTTOMS UP
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
the only thing you said was do the helicopter dick
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
I just shaved my "bikini area" into a fucking pizza slice
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
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