I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
How could you give up sex for lent? I gave up religion for lent years ago and never looked back. Or give up civility, not sex.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I'm just gonna go have sex with whom ever is in the men's room.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
I don't know what's worse. The fact that my biological mother is an unwitting bigamist, or the fact that my half sister is trying to seduce my girlfriend.
I found a 9 minute video on my phone of you singing into an eggplant.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize